Welcome Into The Darkness

Hey all, Im another side of Ainnan.. My name, hmm… still Ainnan i guess? Just like to talk about a few things… I always wondered, what is the definition of friend? Seriously, when I parted my ways with my 5-year long friends, I felt like we were distaning, n that I sometimes don’t feel like Im their friend anymore.. But, how could that be, where did all those 5 years went?? It went into trash or Im just de freaking trash?? However, me n my 3 verrrry good friends are still plus-minus the same.. but, in 10 years time? Where would we be..(I wish Im already in grave at that time…) I damn hate changes but that’s what the world is forcing me to take.. Im changed? I dont think soo.. It’s just that I never felt any right moment to show the people the real me… they would banished me I guess.. Hey, that’s not all that bad right?? Shhh!! Stop talking to yourself! Okay, back to the story… Friend story..mm, I think it ends there coz it’s just a wondering moment for me.. Hm, I had a lot to talk about but it ain’t coming out right now, darn it!

Well, the title tells you the story already I guess.. It was 6th November dat day.(wow, its already 10th now..man, time does fly..) Me,Saiha n Fiz decided to wait for the bus.. it was quite long n everybody was talkin s*** bout mtc038 paper.. Da lame sgt tunggu, bus yg sgtla besar tuh xnmpkla jgk bygnye.. So,we changed plan n started to walk back.. Sai lead us to d shortcut path.. N dat’s when I, the 1st one saw 2 police type of dogs.. They were handsome dogs though looked a bit scary.. So, I was like, oh my God! N we were all starting to blurb things like don’t run, walk slowly back.. The dogs were staring at us and suddenly started running towards us, it was a slow pace run though, thank Goodness.. So, Fiz and Saiha ran like hell.. What was so damn funny is, Saiha, who was having a fever ran like a marathon runner leaving me n Fiz. Xbley blanhye, Fiz was wearing high heels n she looked funny running with it.. I was at d back of course, left way behind to have the 2 handsome dogs for myself…Hahaha! Sakit blakang maa… Nyways, I managed to runaway but the distance between me n the dogs was near.. Imagine this headings in the Star "3 UiTM Students Being Chased By Dogs, 1 - Now in the Hopsital"  That would be damn funny and embarassing of course, duhh…! It was a fun experience though… lest i was caught.. huhu!

Yesterday was the day of total emotional unstability.. Thanks to learning of mtc016..or, malaysian politics and government. I outburtsted terribly…Mmule me n my roommates yumi n saiha study dlm kekurangbetulan kpale hotak…n den, I couldn’t stand my feelings longer when my mom called.. She said the word "exam" that suddenly completely separates my brains..I remembered that Ive forgotten most of the things that Ive studied n read like almost 5 tmes n some topics,more..I cried like hell coz sedey sgt.. I pk, where have I done wrong..? Nk kate tgk pornographic xde, tgk guys byk sgt pon x(serious kay..), minum air gas, xde..mkn asam, lame da x sntuh asam..Felt so frustrated..don’t know with who.. So, after hanging up the phone, I went to the toilet n cried.. yg xbley blahnye, I gi ‘pandai’ sgt bkak shower n ‘mandi’ dgn baju n sluar! "pandainyee!!" bengongla time tuh.. blk bilik mnggigil pastu trpaksela gi basuh n keringkan baju n sluar yg basah..kn da jd satu keje bod**… After saying sorry to all my roommates for my behaviour, I okla sket… Tried to study, xmau msk.. Tried to sleep xmau tido…ntahlah…What life am I leading???

Here’s a new post on my blog since quite a while.. Duhh, da kate final exam.. Nyways, got a new experience on Tuesday.. Guess what, on the day of my 1st exam, it was english paper.. it rained like crazy I tell u..seriously.. Man, people yg pakai payung pon lenjun imagine.. The rain came in every direction n the guys in my same course n batch were around n we were like trying to hide from the rain helplessly but failed, obviously.. Gile3x lebatla dat day, I dont know why.. Then de bus was soaking wet, our condition was like what this person dat I know said, "macam baru lps berenang".. Klaka lar after thinking about it now.. But at that time, I was freaking out though I dont know with who.. Ah, yes, my university for helding our darn exam outside the university, sounds illogical I know.. Da tuh, buat exam dlm dewan yg psg aircond cm dlm fridge kt bhg atas tuh, bhg sejuk beku.. Gilo ar!!! I honestly, had to take 10 minutes before I could move my fingers to write my answers.. Dala lenjun, duk dlm aircond sejuk beku.. Nasib soalan not so hard but I gile3x could’ve done better..especially de essay yg agk kacangla,yela tajuk die write an article on advantages of team-building camp..duhh? da bg points lak tuh.. I so am mad about it!

Well, it is almost ending.. My first semester as a university student.. It has been a rough journey and I doubt if I enjoyed the whole journey.. Too much pain I guess.. But then, there were some gay (happy I mean, not that homosexual thingy kay!) moments.. I’ve done all my assignments except my mtc016.. A relief for me..big relief I tell you. However, the result of every assignment and test are not all that ‘relieving’ if you know what I mean.. My mtc038 test sucks, my drama was terrible, (but my lecturer was ok with it, so, who cares I guess..) my forum went fine but too long, my csc 134 overall marks are quite okay, at least for me.. Hey, i was not prepared at all.. my  MUET was horrible… I really hope some miracle will happen.. Nyways, I’ve babled too much about this whole thing.. Ciao first aite! Btw, wish me ALL THE LUCK in the world for my final exams kay!

hey korg.. lame xblogging eh.. mne xnyer, idop aku nowadays da di ambang ke arah tanjung rambutan.. gile ar pale otak aku ni dah dgn assignment last minute yg lecturers bg dgn amatla brtimbang rase.. the last i checked i had 13 assignments on my belt.. added with final yg gile dkat, cm tgh main "cak cak" je da… mnambahla lg risiko utk aku hilang kebolehan mngawal diri aku nih.. pastuh, aku plg xbley blah bile kne blaja bnde yg xde kne ngene dgn idop aku  yg aku sndri  xminat nk truskn.. korg imagine ar, kitorg kne blaja drama? mybela konon2 tujuannye tuk aja kitorg blakon.. cme aku ni trpakse pgang wtk a guy.. ai, nk suro aku blaja jd laki watper?? besides, iv been acting my whole life maa.. lg satu, csc.. computer.. blaja basic n necessary things xpela.. ni x, blaja psl bus line ar, RAM ar.. n tah hape2 lgla.. duli hape aku mnde2 tuh? janji pc n internet ley brfungsi dala… buku dala berat.. tmbh lak dgn kwn2 yg xmmberangsangkn..ishh! pecah pale aku ni kalo theory fiziknye ble pcah ikut kebengangan org… so, in a nutshell, I DAMN HATE MY FREAKING LIFE!!!!!!

Hmm.. 1stly, assignment da byk gile.. Lecturer pulun skali gus.. Patut bgla earlier so that we can concentrate on studying time2 nk dkat final nih.. Gram jgkla, but i see it coming.. mane xnye, klas lain sebok dgn mcm2 assignment, klas kitorg lenggang sawi jek.. Nyways, td I went nuts.. Ttibe trase nk jd gedik.. So, I pn jdla.. Guys in my class sume xthn.. Xtaula takut iman jatuh or coz mmg nyampah.. Oh well, that’s the point of being a gedikses.. Bengkekla, nk final exam nila nk buat bnde2 bodoh, buang mase etc.. Rase nk lmpang diri sndiri jer(lame xbuat cmtuh..rindula plk..).. Dala, xmo lame2 kt cc nih.. Nk naik room n study…! Jaane peeps!   

To my classmates yg bace blog I n rase cm I nih nyampah seklas dgn korg.. I have no feelings like that towards korg.. Honestly, I’m kinda greatful dpt classmates cm korg.. Adela reason2.. Maybe the most obvious is that korg xbyk prob dgn I n xby songeh n xngade trlebey..n some other reasons. Nyways, the thing is, I hope korg ley except me just like I except korg okay N to my future classmates, if I was among the ones yg kne kua(hopefully xjd what Pn Hamsiah ckp tuh.. manela tau kn..), I hope korg could take some time to get to know the good side  of me.. Or, if xbrminat  nk bknalan pn, just keep the professional relationship between colleagues  around so that we can suceed this course..Amin..

Darn! 1st n foremost.. Smlm tido lame giler, cm kne druged.. Gile sedey coz wasted my time on sleep.. I should have studied ;(  Then, td  got  2 know some bad news from my student coordinator(which means the info should proof real..), that next semester kne rombak klas.. From 7 to 8 klas coz kononnye class right now is too crowded.. Konon kt lab comp xmuat.. Huh.. Maybe just kuakan 4/5 student from each present class n msukkn dlm the new, eighth class.. Lame or what..?! Dala my name ni ske trmsk dlm pmilihan bnde2 yg nyusahkn.. Dlu kne plkn, padehal diri ni sakit.. Abis tuh, I had to go through hell lot of messy things which was the annoying stare from the nurses n MRI.. MRI was the worst, I had to lay down pakai baju hosp yg nipis tuh dlm aircond for almost 2 hours n I can’t n must not move or have to go through again.. Imagine the pain.. Org dala sakit tulang, sejuk lg, kne stay still lg.. Crazy maa.. N all that was bcoz the PLKN xmo trime doc  pkr kt putrajaya pnye simple memo stating that i can’t do activity physical…? Dorg nk memo yg complicated jgk.. Anyways, now, I think next sem, if they randomly select the student, my name, hig possibilitynye akn naik.. It’s not that I love my classmates like hell.. It’s just the fact that I have to go through the whole gruelling moments of knowing other people tuh yg I hate to bare.. I dala mls giler thp dewa nk buat kwn.. Dgn prangai cmnih..lgla sekse… BENGONG!!!

It’s tiring.. I feel lonely even though my friends and family are around me.. Wait? Should they be called ‘friends’? Just because we’re studying the same thing, does it mean we’re friends??? Anyways, u guys outside there xde prob cm aku ker? U know, this lonely feeling yg mkn de inside of u? Aku nyampah tgk human beings n that includes myself? Am I sick? Maybe.. Funny, slumber rock je aku merepek cmni. Ai, kalo da keje nnti merepek cmni lg sure problem rite.. Oh well, I judt hope that when I finaly have a job, my boss won’t see me.. Just see my work.